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Staffing Confessions

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When you get that member that continues to ask questions about things that are clearly answered in the site info... some even in big bold letters, IN CAPS, and in more than one place... but they ask anyways and then say "Woops didn't see it"...
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pronounsHe/Him/His
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Hey, you know friend, if you disagree with something or have a better suggestion on how to improve a specific system on the site or just wanna give a small opinion on a member group or whatever...Be respectful about it please. Don’t write me an essay friend...Be civil...It’s not that deep to throw a temper tantrum. Y’know, be cordial buddy. Not a dick...cause then I’ll be inclined to ignore you until you leave and go away and learn how to not be a dick...And when ya learn, try again.
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Hey, you know friend, if you disagree with something or have a better suggestion on how to improve a specific system on the site or just wanna give a small opinion on a member group or whatever...Be respectful about it please. Don’t write me an essay friend...Be civil...It’s not that deep to throw a temper tantrum. Y’know, be cordial buddy. Not a dick...cause then I’ll be inclined to ignore you until you leave and go away and learn how to not be a dick...And when ya learn, try again.


Preach! Not like you worked your ass off to make those systems in the first place or anything just for someone to come around and poop all over saying how they can do it so much better and what you SHOULD do just because they disagree. Sorry. This hit me hard lol
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i think honestly the thing i miss most about being a member instead of being a staffer is being allowed to make mistakes.

as a staffer, i feel like it's my job to behave as responsibly as possible at all times and if i make even a single little mistake, especially on resource communities, it's going to be something that sticks around and doesn't only negatively affects me but also affects the site as well. because people talk, reps travel, and all it takes is one bad thing to completely ruin your rep (and thus drag your site down by proxy) for months to years to come.

it's the worst since i end up second-guessing a lot of the decisions i make (especially hard or messy ones) and i always feel so self-conscious existing in a lot of public spaces talking about certain subjects since i just don't want my sites to be punished because i worded something wrong or something's been taken out of context or i've made an honest to goodness actual mistake that the internet chooses to remember long after i'd made it and tried to make amends or otherwise move on from it.

I feel you. I need to remember to shut my god damn mouth. Oh weeellll. Seems people are just gonna give me an excuse to step down.
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in turning divine, we tangle endlessly

note to self: the giddy excitement you had when people joined your site at its fledgling stages? never lose that. that's another living, breathing human being that saw what you had to put together and said "hell yes, i want to be a part of that too" that's amazing. cherish each new member whether they stick around for 1 week or 1 year. don't let time make you jaded.
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i fucked up with the skin code and i copy/pasted over it and while i had a back up....looking at the skin again, i realize i dont like the banner, or the colors, so im just gonna make a new one. and while im at it, i think re-do the setting's layout and map, see if i like that better too. so it's still not gonna be done any time soon, but who knows, maybe this will work out way better!

Piggy backing on this with something super similar but: Coding a skin and its templates before working on the site info, then about half-way through or when you're nearly done with the info you've been staring at the forsaken skin so long you're sick of it and want something else.

And then during that re-skinning time you think of other things you can add to the site while you're at it, which means more info to write. The cycle never ends. help.
last edit on Oct 1, 2018 18:42:49 GMT by Deleted
phantom of the black parade
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what do you want to know? my height, hobbies, quirks, the color of my underwear?
i really don't like handling staff stuff over discord. at all. as a member, i like discord servers since they're really convenient; as a staffer, i'm just not a fan half the time.

i think it's because like. i don't like the occasions where newbies come riding up into my dms to ask if they can do something that just makes me go "in what reality would you ever think that's okay". i don't like the high-stakes pressure to more or less always be around and immediately responding to something regardless of whatever it is i'm doing at the time. and i especially don't like when members don't get their way on something and they then come to confront me over a staff-wide decision as though a one-on-one complaint to me will turn a no into a yes.

look i have some stories about my discord experiences, okay, and some of them are a trip

i guess i just high-key miss the etiquette that went on with pms because actually having to write things out tended to weed out some of the system-breakers, there was a longer "acceptable" waiting period for a response, and answers were hard lines in the sand rather than the start of a dialogue.
last edit on Oct 13, 2018 1:33:48 GMT by Kuroya

phantom of the black parade
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what do you want to know? my height, hobbies, quirks, the color of my underwear?
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I feel you. I feel that way about joining servers in general, so I turned off the ability for server people to DM me on Discord. They need to be on my friend's list to private message me. Maybe something you could consider?


i have considered it before but the problem is that it actually doesn't solve the problem. i don't have a problem with people dming me to plot or check in with me on stuff - i just very understandably hate dealing with people who whine over staff decisions in my dms or who want to ask if their super op character is all right after they link to an app. but if i turn off dms then i'll get people asking why they can't dm me and not only do i then have that awkward discussion in public but i also am then stuck in a catch-22 if it's someone i wouldn't want to talk to in a private setting since now i either have to publicly be a jerk over it or i have to bite the bullet and let them friend me and talk to me anyway.

honestly it may sound like i'm not a fan of servers but it's really that i'm not a fan of a lot of the social etiquette that's popping up with them tbeh.
last edit on Oct 13, 2018 12:54:26 GMT by Kuroya

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I feel you. I feel that way about joining servers in general, so I turned off the ability for server people to DM me on Discord. They need to be on my friend's list to private message me. Maybe something you could consider?
i have considered it before but the problem is that it actually doesn't solve the problem. i don't have a problem with people dming me to plot or check in with me on stuff - i just very understandably hate dealing with people who whine over staff decisions in my dms or who want to ask if their super op character is all right after they link to an app. but if i turn off dms then i'll get people asking why they can't dm me and not only do i then have that awkward discussion in public but i also am then stuck in a catch-22 if it's someone i wouldn't want to talk to in a private setting since now i either have to publicly be a jerk over it or i have to bite the bullet and let them friend me and talk to me anyway.

honestly it may sound like i'm not a fan of servers but it's really that i'm not a fan of a lot of the social etiquette that's popping up with them tbeh.
maybe make a private channel? If people wanna talk privately you can drag them into there temporarily. Remove the ability for them to see past conversations in that channel and then once you've discussed what you need to, remove them from it?

Help channels are also good for like major site plot stuff they wanna ask about bc I'm sure others will ask and they can check back there.
phantom of the black parade
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what do you want to know? my height, hobbies, quirks, the color of my underwear?
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maybe make a private channel? If people wanna talk privately you can drag them into there temporarily. Remove the ability for them to see past conversations in that channel and then once you've discussed what you need to, remove them from it?

Help channels are also good for like major site plot stuff they wanna ask about bc I'm sure others will ask and they can check back there.

we have a policy in place that staff won't handle staffing concerns and such in dms. so far it's solved our problems since it flat out forces people back into pms for the stupid things. and it means they actually have to think about what it is they want to deal with.

we still answer questions in our help desk. we just don't deal with those really specific kinds of questions for like "i want to play this ridiculously overpowered character, so now i'm gonna ask 5000000 questions that basically boil down to having the staff green light an app before it's ever submitted for review" (which the latter is a pet peeve regardless of chat but i've found it more common on discord). and now we don't have to deal with people showing up in our dms to complain about being denied or pended or the inevitable "discussion" over being told no because dms are a discussion where pms don't allow that wiggle room (at least not in real time anyway).

honestly i don't mind most dms. i just really don't like the ones where we're more or less line item going through an app for someone or where people are complaining about a staff decision or where conversations happen over stuff that don't really have wiggle room just so someone can get around rules or lore.