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Staffing Confessions

aliasjo, honey
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honey and the forgor land
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fed up with y'all bitches
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When members perceive every little thing that puts their character at a slight disadvantage or in a slightly complicated situation as a personal slight against you, the staff admin, who is trying to balance and DM an event to make it enjoyable for everyone.

No one is out to get you. You signed up for this event, you know the consequences that the environment is very much "here be dragons", and it was such a small thing to complain over because your characters didn't have the perfect skill set to completely steamroll over event content.

This isn't a video game level where you're gunning for a perfect, no damage taken speedrun. This is a story that's a collaboration effort on everyone's part, and damn, will I prioritize the narrative and making sure everyone else is having fun over your insecure needs to be a boring perfectionist.

Edit: If you don't know how to solve a problem through creative writing (and after given options too! by the DM!) and then throw a small tantrum about things being unfair, I don't think this hobby is for you.
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SAY IT LOUDER FOR THE GIRLS IN THE BACK
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Can I just say if this is the same person.... they had more than one email and seem to have an obsession with one of the staff members on our site? Trying to sort that out without breaking any rules since we honestly didn't want to handle it through discord has been one hell of a hassle too. So VPN, either there is multiple people with the same obsession or it is just the one trying to cause drama, in which case, I failed to believe them to change despite others on my team saying otherwise.... Like it got to the point where I said, with all due respect, if they are allowed back I'm leaving. >.> And that was just because I couldn't handle their behavior anymore.

I think it is a good thing I didn't handle many of our problemed children, else I might have left a bad taste for the site when it really should be reflected on my actions and mine alone.
last edit on Oct 29, 2021 20:50:51 GMT by Deleted
Feline Overlord
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Omg... this is more ironic than you know... So first off, the member I referred to was somebody who did nothing too bad off. Just one thing that irked me as a not cool. They did not enter the degree yours did, but enough to for me to give them the "Really?" stare.

HOWEVER, based on the information this could potentially be a former member. I will not confirm or deny for their sake, but this is a familiar attitude you mentioned. So I may know this problem child. XD I will say good luck in regards to that, nonetheless. Whether they are the same person or not, I understand those behaviours can be frustrating the handle. I am holding out in hope they change and improve themselves, but you can never know with people.

As for the immediately staff hostile, I have not had that yet. This being said the most awkward situation I had in regards to this was somebody who treated everyone, but myself and another admin like dirt. It reached the intensity in a mere week that my other admin told me they feared them because they displayed stalker-ish behaviours. x.x It... was not a fun situation. That was long ago and I pre-banned their IP on my current site for my one admin's safety and reassurance.
Yeah, at first it was the same for us. They didn't necessarily break any rules at first, they just... were very provoking. xD But after a few minutes, they probably broke every rule we had. They're not a member at KD, the situation really escalated after I suspended them for linking porn. Contacted Jcink and everything; Jcink called it a "forum raid" and their only solution (because they had no better tools than we did) was to lock the board indefinitely and manually approve accounts because the "raider" had a VPN with an impossibly large range with an almost seemingly indefinite amount of proxy IPs at their disposal with no relations to each other (so, wildcarding their IPs didn't work). We could just block every IP they come in with, but one never knows just how many IPs they have. We opted not to lock the board and wait it out because locking the board would hurt, and trolls almost always run out of steam and lose interest anyway. It was probably the second worse issue we've had. Worse in that it was the hardest one to "contain," but the individual wasn't the worst one we've had.

I've had - at two forums - at least one person who became very obsessed with me the way you're talking about. xD The first time, they mistook me as a staff member. The second time, I was an actual staffer. It was... flattering at first in both scenarios, but after a while it started to cause issues. So, I totally get what you and your teammate mean.

Hopefully things calm down for you and your team soon!

P.S. Foxxy, the best mod I've ever had basically acted as my brain secretary. As an admin, there's just so much going on what with posts, revising info, plans/projects/events, answering questions, going over apps/claims, blahblahblah, that I get really scatterbrained. I think I am a lot less productive now that I don't really have someone asking me/reminding me of things. It probably depends on the individual staff and/or team, but I find it very useful and and appreciate it; it sounds like your fellow staffer does too. :)

Okay, I am rolling out of this discussion. /Rambled too long and too much

I hope staff do not mind this, I just want to reference what @spiritfoxxy said and kinda give some suggestions in case this is the same person. I hope you do not mind, I am sure you can handle this, but I have an addiction to trying to help. >.>

The person we handled had multiple IP addresses, and as a disclaimer, my site is ProBoards. I am not sure how Jcink works. Anyways, I recommend sorting through their posts if you still have them. I went through all their posts and applications on my site and banned IPs linked to those posts to thoroughly ban them. As Foxxy said, if this is the same individual, they did have multiple e-mails, so I recommend banning each of their accounts individually if your goal is to thoroughly ban them.

If you really suspect this is the same person and/or it is getting out of hand/more extreme, you are welcomed to PM me here and I can provide my Discord if you need things like bannable e-mails and IPs; I will likely only provide if they are proven as the same person, since anybody I ban, I believe deserves a second chance should they enter another site. Since they have already broken your rules to that extent, I am willing to provide to help with lowering their ability on sneaking back on your site. Naturally, this is up to you, I just wanted to offer since I know my staff team and I were frustrated with the situation. Heck, I was placed as staff to member interaction while another admin of mine, Dremulf, played devil's advocate for an unbiased view of the situation. So as somebody who was deeply involved in similar problems, I can definitely sympathize.

anyways, I will stop on this topic now, I just hoped my little suggestion may help other members going through a similar situation.
praise the cats!
aliasthomas, breezescodes
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this is my murder mittens ^-^
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I feel like when you are an admin/staff, people want to roleplay the shit out of you. When you're just another member, people forget who you are and you have to depend on your own set of socialization skills because people tend to kiss the ass of the management team over anything else.

heckkin what kinda staff r u is my question tho. like where do u staff @t too. b/c as far as i've seen, no one is looking to kiss my ass by rping w/ me lmao. in fact??? i find that staff tend to b the ones who like - rp the least??? aside from lurkers ofc - but like - ghghghgh???? MAN I WANT TO BE STAFF WHEREVER UR STAFF @t. PLS SOMEONE THROW PLOTS AND THREADS @t MY FEET

edit: i have been informed that the reason i don't notice a difference between staff v member is because i am so vocal either way that there's no difference - so uh,,, voice, u gotta be screaming screaming screaming to the sky !! i believe in u !!!
last edit on Mar 12, 2020 3:43:31 GMT by bc
internally screaming
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stressed, depressed, and probably not well-dressed
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I feel like when you are an admin/staff, people want to roleplay the shit out of you. When you're just another member, people forget who you are and you have to depend on your own set of socialization skills because people tend to kiss the ass of the management team over anything else.


I have literally had this once and that's cause it was a new fandom. It's not like people don't want to not rp with me but they don't communicate cause admin scary which means thread goes dead after one character solves the main conflict. I wish people wanted to rp with me and communicate, woo boy.

in other news, I stg, sometimes I am the most organized and productive on staff and that's not a good look when I'm actually lazy af. Cause some days I just don't wanna do something or post, but I gotta cause no one on staff is going to do it without me asking and I don't wanna be a nag.
phantom of the black parade
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what do you want to know? my height, hobbies, quirks, the color of my underwear?
i just made the executive decision to suspend all activity checks/requirements on my sites until further notice while everything's going nuts and i don't feel even remotely bad about it.

there's enough going on right now for people to be worrying about, and a lot of it is far greater priority than whether or not someone can manage to get a post out, so as much as it might suck for people who are waiting on claims to open up, i would rather make sure my members can stay safe and healthy than i would add just one more thing to stress them out on their already over-full plates.
last edit on Mar 19, 2020 2:06:13 GMT by Kuroya

Feline Overlord
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I was cleaning up my site today so the boards are nice and tidied. Gosh, when the Thread Created By area says deleted because muse was lost for the first character, I have to resist every impulse not to accidentally archive it. >.> My brain goes "Ooooh, I see a DELETED, off to the- NO THAT IS AN ACTIVE PERSON! STOP CHIBI!" Sad part is, it gets me every time and the person is a long-time member. XD Please my mind, stop thinking you can archive that thread, you should know better by now.
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I feel like I have some catching up to do with my own staff duties. Just to add onto my friend's comment, it doesn't help that proboards finds it right to change the alias to delete when it was helpful to know who that person was. Like was there no way to avoid a link between one old alias and new alias of the same tag linking up. I get they want privacy but it is just an alias, I'm still able to see the ip which I few as my right, since so many people have broken site rules and perhaps that one was supposed to remain banned, if you get what I mean. Also they plan on making it even worse with their changes just for the sake of their privacy. I'm just thinking to myself, so I have to possibly risk a member who was banned coming back because I feel like the forum owner is losing rights in keeping in check whom they want to join through a public method.