granted, but the motivation only lasted ten seconds

i wish I didn’t have insomnia

seems legit

Granted. Now you do nothing but sleep for 23 hours a day. Every day.

I wish to play games.

Granted, have fun playing "Spongebob Heropants."

I wish I could fly~

oh good lord the absolute audacity. -shudders-

Granted: It lasts for approximately 10 seconds ~Spoiler for possible tw idk think dark humor is a trauma response~

that was really dark of me wow. i am sorry. @.@

i wish dark humor was not my coping mechanism.

Granted, but something darker will be your coping mechanism. Sorry I didn't know what else to do ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I wish Jcink would let me delete one of my accounts.

Your wish has been granted, now all jcink sites turn into proboards!

I wish that I could go back in time to my childhood with ALL the knowledge I have now. \o/

granted, but you wind up unable to speak to anyone so even though you're super smart and knowledgeable, you can't express it and no one takes you seriously.

I wish I had some confidence...

granted! but now you have a god complex, and you become a chuunibyou.

i wish i could write perfect purple prose!

granted! all your prose is now a perfect shade of the color purple.

i wish i had the power to turn back time.

Granted, but a mole will pop out of the ground and lecture you every time you do

I wish Genshin had another eyepatched character to round out my meme team

Granted, now you only write one extra sentence.

I wish anxiety wasn't killing my dreams.

Granted but first you have to do difficult things like challenging your negative thoughts and core beliefs.

I'm thirsty. I wish I had some water to drink.