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Staffing Confessions

phantom of the black parade
pronounsshe / her pronouns
4,238written posts
Kuroyaearned bits
offlinecurrently
Kuroya
Part of the Furniture
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at this, the world's end, do we cast off tomorrow~!
i feel like i'm in either one of two moods when it comes to site-making

mood 1: if you want something done right, you gotta do it yourself

mood 2: oh shiva i don't want to have to be responsible for things asdfjkl-


praise the cats!
aliasthomas, breezescodes
pronounshe/him
825written posts
bcearned bits
offlinecurrently
bc
Summer '19 Bingo Completionist
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this is my murder mittens ^-^
i nope out of conflict hard these days tbh ://

problems arise ==> || me cowering like a little bitch

sorry can't conflict anymore. my uh. backbone???? crapped itself so now i try Not to get involved or i back out like an almost cornered animal
last edit on Apr 22, 2020 11:41:29 GMT by bc
pronounshe/him/his
145written posts
kewkewearned bits
offlinecurrently
kewkew
Full Member
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bc Avatar
i nope out of conflict hard these days tbh ://


I'm not saying I want this problem. I'm just saying the chains holding back my unrelenting rage tremble every day and I hope we can both find happy mediums. <3
pronounshe/him
884written posts
Desmond Milesearned bits
onlinecurrently
Desmond Miles
Part of the Furniture
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we will have peace at any cost
so it turns out i was being a try hard and after getting the "okay" from my staff to stop being one, i feel so much more motivated to work and get things done. the "okay" being "i was working too hard on something without really considering how everyone else was feeling about it and after being told i dont have to do this i feel much better about everything"

Now serving!
Feline Overlord
aliasChibi
pronounsShe/Her
1,797written posts
Chibi Magicianearned bits
offlinecurrently
Chibi Magician
Spring '21 Dev Completionist
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Pure Gremlin Energy
It is always nice when members join in a group. While yes, there is more work to assure the members are okay, at least they can quickly get into RP. No pre-existing threads for them to worry about, so they can at least get threads together until I finish some of mine and can grab a new person.
0written posts
Deletedearned bits
offlinecurrently
Deleted
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Sometimes I ask myself how to be staff and a member at the same time. On the one hand, I have duties, else the site might just crumble, on the other I want to thread, you know? Trying to find that balance can be difficult at times. It doesn't help when I get distracted and do neither. I am grateful when members step in to assist where they can, such as where the information on the site is, or advertising for us, or suggesting species based on what the new person is hoping to make.
pronounsshe/her
329written posts
Mizoearned bits
offlinecurrently
Mizo
Senior Member
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If you are reading this, I am beautiful.
trigger warning : bullying/theft, serious issues(?) just in case people don't feel like reading something heavy atm.


I know that staff members try to stay as impartial to external conflicts that might be dragged into their site, but if a trustworthy member comes to me about another that has stolen/plagiarized content/graphics/code, or that has harassed people, I would not hesitate to kick them off the site. It's good to be impartial, but I don't really think being impartial is the best way to deal with people that has a reputation for theft or bullying in the community, because it feels like looking at a toxic member and going "well I'm sure other members won't be affected by them at all, and I'll only do something if they are".

The damage can be done even in their first day or two. Or three. In some cases- and I emphasize on the word some- prevention is better than cure. If you are aware that there's a high chance a member is going to bully others, then you're kind of an asshole of an admin for stepping back and letting other members take the brunt of the damage before you take action. (sorry for the strong words here.)

I also feel like it's extremely demeaning to look at a member that you do like, pouring their heart out to you about being bullied, and going "well, there's nothing I can do about it until so and so bullies someone again." It feels like I'm trivializing their problem in my own selfish way, suggesting to them that I don't genuinely care about their previous struggles unless it affects me or the site I'm on.

Note :  Please note that I'm not referring to petty fights. I'm referring to serious cases of bullying or theft. If it's just some passive aggressive disagreement they have, then I agree it's best to be impartial.
last edit on Apr 25, 2020 11:30:39 GMT by Mizo

Feline Overlord
aliasChibi
pronounsShe/Her
1,797written posts
Chibi Magicianearned bits
offlinecurrently
Chibi Magician
Spring '21 Dev Completionist
Chibi Magician Avatar
Pure Gremlin Energy
Mizo Avatar
trigger warning : bullying/theft, serious issues(?) just in case people don't feel like reading something heavy atm.


I know that staff members try to stay as impartial to external conflicts that might be dragged into their site, but if a trustworthy member comes to me about another that has stolen/plagiarized content/graphics/code, or that has harassed people, I would not hesitate to kick them off the site. It's good to be impartial, but I don't really think being impartial is the best way to deal with people that has a reputation for theft or bullying in the community, because it feels like looking at a toxic member and going "well I'm sure other members won't be affected by them at all, and I'll only do something if they are".

The damage can be done even in their first day or two. Or three. In some cases- and I emphasize on the word some- prevention is better than cure. If you are aware that there's a high chance a member is going to bully others, then you're kind of an asshole of an admin for stepping back and letting other members take the brunt of the damage before you take action. (sorry for the strong words here.)

I also feel like it's extremely demeaning to look at a member that you do like, pouring their heart out to you about being bullied, and going "well, there's nothing I can do about it until so and so bullies someone again." It feels like I'm trivializing their problem in my own selfish way, suggesting to them that I don't genuinely care about their previous struggles unless it affects me or the site I'm on.

Note :  Please note that I'm not referring to petty fights. I'm referring to serious cases of bullying or theft. If it's just some passive aggressive disagreement they have, then I agree it's best to be impartial.

Can I say, I heavily agree with this. If someone approaches me with serious concerns and that member has shown to be trustworthy, then I would rather do something than do nothing. As a staff member, I consider it a necessity to protect my members where possible. Regularly, I follow the protocol of requesting any proof that member has so I can present it to staff and so I can catalog the events/reasons behind there ban; even if the action was already taken, I still request it since I am a forgetful butt. Petty drama is one thing, but when there is repetitive behaviour of toxicity, especially to a member already on that forum, I have no reason to stand by.
pronounsyes
257written posts
styrofoam eaterearned bits
offlinecurrently
styrofoam eater
Senior Member
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i like the cronch
I am utterly terrified that my new site won't work out. I feel like everything I start is doomed to fail, this being no exception. Sometimes I wonder if I should even try at all- there's not a lot that feels worse than investing hundreds of hours into something you love only to realize you're the only one who cares.
446written posts
wolfeearned bits
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wolfe
Senior Member
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Godmodding corrections are always awk.

Either they go "Oh crap, didn't mean to!" and edit or they double and triple down on it and escalate it from "Hey stop that" to someone way worse I don't wanna deal with.

There are legitimately some characters/concepts that are so fragile I think they only work in fanfiction. If you cannot ever lose and cannot ever be challenged in a situation where your character is wrong and cannot ever fail a task, maybe collaborative writing is not for you. Other people want their characters to win or be "objectively right" at least once in a while, too.

I put "objectively right" in quotation marks because I hate that term and don't think it exists. If someone runs me over but is having a bad day and is tired and their house roof fell in and they have a screaming child in the backseat distracting them I'm still gonna be mad that I got ran over no matter how many excuses are piled on.
last edit on Apr 28, 2020 20:36:47 GMT by wolfe