I want the Zhongli pajamas.

no harm no foul. Like y'all have to understand some of the wild dm's I get. I have helped someone with coding and they wanted to know where I live so they could hug me. One person told me they were going to kill a forum user. Discord is wild and I am just pleading that people think about others.

Preferably not dm me and tell me that you're jealous of my husband and they would cure my heart problems.

I sound extreme because I have seen things.

I do state my boundary! I'm quite up front with it. I said "hey I'm uncomfortable with this type of reaching out when I don't know you." and I move on. What people call their friend is no deal at all to me. All I was bringing up is consider it! You can consider if a person is friendly or not. They might be fun online briefly but an absolute nightmare in dm's. That's okay to have that boundary.

And it's easy! My developmental disorder makes categories that are very arbitrary. I'm editing this to shorten it, but basically, my brain is different than yours and it's okay. I'm not sure why certain things have been said in your posts, but I do plead that the point was literally, and I'm saying this as flatly as possible. If you can avoid triggers in posts by thinking and reading, you might be able to avoid a sticky situation by not making sure you're both cool with the decision. Something to take in consideration.

If I could choose I would be quite normal about things. I am not. But I am fun. As long as you are not my doctors because then I will fight you.

thanks for coming to my ted talk

tbh I have no idea how we got here considering I was just saying, 'hey respect people's boundaries, if you're not that familiar with them, don't make group dm's with just random people. I was saying it could apply with people getting a bit too close to you in rp that you don't like. No grandstanding or anything, I require time gates to unlock my friendship card because then I know you're too deep in the swamp with me. So again, I don't really know why this developed to this degree when I thought respecting people's boundaries wasn't a hot take. What other people do is none of my business or how they conduct themselves, I'm just a gremlin granny on the internet and I see no need to just bust through people's boundaries good ("let's be friends!") or bad ("Have I ever told you you're mature for your age").

Again, I didn't know that was a hot take, lol. I apologize coming in with fire I didn't know I had.

btw, I did just general replies cause I'm very confused on the take that you couldn't sort your relationships in boxes and it was negative towards those who want to be friends with everyone. I don't put my husband (a rp friend from forever ago) in the same box as my mother (who has possibly or will possibly let the cats eat my eyeballs when I die). I would be very creeped out if someone started to 'mom' me on the internet. But again, I didn't know it would be something so strange as a boundary, lmao.

I don't think disagreement on how people sort relationships is discourse, lol. I think people are disagreeing on how they sort friends/friendly relationships. Also "parasocial" just means a relationship with someone you personally don't know or a character. They don't even have to be real, you can be parasocial with a book character. Most people you know, in passing, only know facets of your character. So this could certainly be "have a relationship with someone you don't know" as if you don't know a lot of facets, then you can learn them, but if you only end up learning one side, then no you don't know the person that well. The way I am using this specific word is to say I don't share a lot of myself online so a lot of people don't know me all that well.

Again, I was pointing out how other people do not have to accept anything done. Again, how other people use the word friend is very much a social, linguistic, semantic, and etc - to most people. People are into calling each other friend and think people like me are monsters or uncaring. I don't care what they think? I'm not going to go be mean to someone but I'm also not going to sit here and pretend otherwise. I play games with plenty of random people, I watch tv, say happy birthday, cause that's the basic requirement for me to be friendly - like I would in a office, or whatever. However, I don't think I'm going to be showing them my blood test results or letting them borrow money. Voice chats and games do not a friend make, they're starting points for a friend. Just like - a bit derogatory in this context - "rp friends" are more than people who just took my want ad. They could be someone on three or four sites, they could be there for two or three years, idk, but yes, I would consider having a boundary to be natural and healthy. Some people have a boundary not to trauma dump. Is okay if they're "friends"? No.

I think it's funny that people do so and like I said as this didn't have to do with rp in the first place and it was actually a gaming thing where someone added me like I was their friend, I was not. Hence, I had thought it was a good conversation stater to remind that you and I are different and respecting people's boundaries is good and swell~ If you feel the need to make deep connections with people, I hope people make deep connections for you so you can be happy! I don't need to wrap myself around anyone to have emotional connections that support me, instead for me, we figure out each other and then slowly become friends. Curate your own friends, your experience, and your life how you see fit, as long as you respect others to do so!

Hot take, I do think some people need to realize we're strangers on the internet three fourths of the time and friends maybe a fourth. Sometimes you have to put in a lot of effort, sometimes you don't. Sometimes you need to do a little bit of work to plot with others, because you don't know them. Sometimes they're friends because they saw you bawl your eyes out over a disney movie and know your actor crush. There's different levels to know people and all that should be clear!

btw, this isn't about rp this is literally a gaming server, please do not add me to you, your girlfriend's, and some other guy's random dm chat without asking if I'm okay first, lol. Cause I was not. But it could apply to rp!

what do people use more of, site info/general tables or like...other templates like dev/posting/comms. I'm so slug-brained I just use justify like a uncultured swine.

Personally I laugh when I see "the rpc is dead" when like several sites advertised in the past few weeks - but sure, it's dead and "unhealthy".

I'm sorry to be blunt, but people want different things out of an rp site. For example I help staff multiple rp sites and some just want a chill thing and some want a distinctly active and popping forum. Some want plot, some want connected sub plots, some people want to write without being judged. There are fewer sites because they are more work, people want different things, and as an older community we're aware of what we want and don't want to expend energy on other things. We don't have as much, therefore sometimes we can't water the grass in the site and the admin thinks that they are at fault because communication. There's plenty of reasons about the rp but the constant nitpicking about how the community acts doesn't help us come together. If you think it's "unhealthy" and I think it's "healthy" or you think it's "dead" and I think it's "alive" - it's all about the perspective.

I understand the person saying it's dead to mean "there's no rps I like, so that mean it must be dead". However Feral has a huge point here - that there's so much demanded of internet hobbies now that it's hard to sometimes just spin something up like a discord. I'm working on like seven projects from scratch, including a huge set of templates for both proboards and jcink to give back to the community. It's a lot of work, but I do think putting effort in to actually help the community grow besides sites as much as possible can work to grow a more realistic and "healthy" view of what is supposed to be a simple internet hobby.

all yous general btw.

I have a very 'girly' name I suppose. I don't really care about my name. My mother named me off a street sign going to the hospital. She had no attachment to the name and I don't care about it either. Rarely do people call me by it and always use nicknames or my screenname/pen name so I haven't had a need to care. I will say that my mother's original planned name died of the diabetus and that as weirdly spot on considering I'm dying of everything including the diabetes but. My last name though? Jesus christ I have a hyphenated name since I'm the last girl of my line, technically, and so I hyphenated it with my husband's multiple last names and I break literally every freaking system that needs it since my last name is so freaking long (no one can say it either so it's funny when my husband just has a fit)

In other news, my lack of care about my name has led to some fascinating nicknames since people just name me whatever. My bosses at work would just call me random names- where it got to the point where I just answer to everything- including also forgetting all these names and someone going 'crazy cat lady' and that made me look up. Heck, when I worked at a computer tech place everyone called me Mama Mac instead of my name including my bosses boss= all twice my age or more.