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How to become more proactive when roleplaying?

the waking storm
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tenebrae
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i bit the tongue behind my teeth (it was never good enough for me)
What's on the tin.

I'm a reactive roleplayer. I've always have been. I could go into a rant how my desire to follow and not lead is tied to my low self esteem, my anxieties, and whatnot - but I don't wanna get into that. What I'm curious and confused about is how I can change from a reactive roleplayer to a proactive one? Even if only a little. I have no clue how to "take charge" as it were, because I'm terrified of overstepping my boundaries and doing something I shouldn't, even tho I'm sure it's just my paranoia. Does anyone have any tips or advice on how to basically become a plot mover instead, well, a plot follower? Sometimes I feel like my plots go literally nowhere because I'm afraid to take initiative and it's driving me crazy - especially when it comes to threads. So... uh... thoughts? ;w;
aliasdismay
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he's suppose to be DEAD
i think comfort / familiarity with your partner is a huge part of this + also plain old fashioned communication. if you have an idea for a thread, but you're not comfortable just doing it, reach out to ur partner and ask how they'd feel about it!! another thing is write threads w set goals in mind, so that way you're already both on the same page about what you want to get out of said thread and can easily move yourselves toward said goal.

a small, super easy thing u can do that can help move a thread forward: moving the setting along.

so like let's say your characters start off outside. maybe it's raining. maybe it's hot. maybe ur character just isnt vibin anymore. maybe they're going somewhere!! you can either 1) have your character ask about going somewhere else or 2) simply move it along in your writing, by basically saying they start walking to a new location.

and like, you dont have to do a big dramatic change either. maybe the moving along is as simple as just walking around a park??

one last tip is to offer small hooks, especially for threads that don't have any particular goals in mind. so going with the park thing again. your characters at a park. maybe your character now sees..... an ice cream truck. it'll be up to the other rp'er whether or not they make use of that.

(sometimes rp'ers DO miss these things, so dont be afraid to be kinda glaringly obvious. like have ur character STARE that ice cream truck D O W N. and i think 90% of rp'ers probably won't care if you imply their characters are walking/moving with yours as long as ur not literally going from the north pole to australia.)

addon: i think moving threads along and making things happen is REALLY difficult for all role players, either because they're not sure how to do it or they have anxiety about it!! but in my experience, writing partners love it when you do things to make stuff happen.
last edit on Jul 13, 2021 22:12:09 GMT by fossa
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ACT IV: HOOLIGAN TALES
A lot of that could stem from, as you said, a personal self confidence issue. My tips are less about 'taking charge' and gathering/presenting yourself in a way that facilitates plot. You don't need to run any big events or make huge waves, start by leading yourself personally and others will follow.

  • Pay attention to site dynamics. What factions are in need. What canons are taken. Use the structure of a site or setting, find the holes in plots, and plug yourself in there where possible.
  • Read what other people write. It's hard to get a plot if two people / characters have nothing in common. If you throw your character out there with no plan you get stuck in situations you're not enthusiastic about but don't want to bail. Read what other people write and think carefully on what interests them and what you can provide. People love it when you do your homework on them.
  • Have a goal for your own character. Pleasant surprises are pleasant but other people can't be expected to provide the font for your character arc(s). Whether it happens quickly over it never happens, having a general idea that can shift over time will help you.
  • Put your character/plots in a weaker position. It's easier for other people to accept your plots if your character is beholden to them, or a servant, messenger, idolizes another, etc. rather than potentially forcing them into thinking a certain way about your character. I never say my character is charming, for example, or intellectual, or several other 'good' traits. I play them as close as I think I can get them and accept what judgement comes my way.
  • Generate some hooks or stand-out tidbits for your character. I do this for all my characters and sometimes I list them publicly and sometimes I don't and let people piece it together. Example: He always looks down when he walks -- why? He collects baseball cards starting from the year 1997 when his parents took him to his first Nippon Pro game. He's afraid of dogs and will run from them (because he was bit when he was younger). So on and so forth, it makes your character memorable, and someone is bound to want to thread based on a hook or interest.


Apologies if I totally misread your question though.
aliasphimbolina
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So, too, is Death possessed of infinite strategies and a gaunt nature.
- know your writing partners / do your research. stallas essentially said it; spend some leisure time reading active threads on the site / memorize fun little details highlighted in character profiles (especially those that are unrelated to you/your character). as a writer it humbles me to know that ppl read my content even tho it's not exactly essential/high quality reading. it makes me want to plot with that person; this sort of pattern stimulates great story-telling in my experience.

- "yes, and—" mentality. start with small plot hooks that could potentially lead to some interesting rp dynamics (assuming a site provides 'freeform' applications i'd suggest utilizing that section to list character objectives and/or the aforementioned plot hooks to give ppl ideas). for example my character is a spy infiltrating the enemy faction; for his current mission to work he is to marry and have a child, thus he creates a fabricated family. yet here's the twist: the "wife" is an assassin and the adopted child is a telepath and they're all unaware of each other's true vocation.. minus the telepath, who flat out just wants a family and will do whatever means to sustain the forged family.

basically you/someone introduces that one hook and everything snowballs from there (and yes i just described the plot of spy x family alright leave me alone!!).

addendum: naturally not every idea may work but its better to provide alternatives than to flat out say no. nothing turns me OFF faster than a writer unwilling to produce a surrogate plot.
last edit on Jul 14, 2021 5:57:37 GMT by PHIMBO
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i agree with everything that's been posted above! i also want to reiterate that communication is key! most people in the rp community are super nice, and as long as you ask and talk to them about what you want to do, they're very willing to work with you, either agreeing to the plot you have in mind or saying no and most of the time, adapting it to work or explaining why it wouldn't.

another thing that i do when i feel like i might overstep boundaries, is asking myself if somebody else were to do come to me with the same thing, how i would feel about it. i think i have a good idea of where my boundaries are "normal" and where they aren't, and in the case where a plot/idea/action in a thread falls under a "normal" boundary, i'll ask myself if said thing oversteps my boundaries. if not, then i usually go for it. if i'm still worried, then that's when i go and ask.

even if you do overstep, i feel like most of the people i've rped with would just let me know and it's honestly not a bit deal. as long as you're (once again) communicating, the two of you will figure out ways to work around it.
the waking storm
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i bit the tongue behind my teeth (it was never good enough for me)
thank you everyone for the advice! it means a lot to me! ;w; i'll keep what you have all told me in mind! thank you so much! c:
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start building your characters less as just a jumble of ideas and instead give them a goal. the character doesn't need to have a goal IC, but you should build one OOC. Then you should have a better idea of how to push threads along, because your goal will keep you moving.

ask your partner what their goals are with the interaction. what do they want out of this? not every thread has to be about your character goal, either, so you can use your partner's character goals as a springboard for what you do in a thread.

not everything is going to be "big" and "epic" in RP, but when writing stories, sometimes it's best to go in with a point to a scene. Whether it's buildup to a joke or a reveal of secrets or setting the stage for a relationship, it is very important to figure out what the skeleton of a thread is if you want to be a proactive plotter.

(and not every thread has to have a skeleton either but you know, this is just what i do.)

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