It no longer sparks joy for me to read new apps, and I get stressed when I hear people wanting to make more characters when they already have 5+ characters. I'm not sure how to get rid of the feeling, but I used to be excited to read apps ;;;

12!!!

I'm going to preface this with this has been my hobby for the longest time— I remember starting all the way in middle school, as cringey as that sounds (and honestly, how unsafe as that sounds now that I look back at it), and have always had the itch to write, enjoying the creative process with others, coming up with new ideas. It's been... eleven years now? Man I feel old. 

I've done a lot during my RP career. I've started and staffed sites, I've been an active participant in many, and it's always been such a delight. However, I'm starting to not quite feel that spark for the first time, and I'm not quite sure what it is. I'm fairly happy with the site that I am currently on, though having a demanding job and grad school does weigh upon me. I used to have a lot of pride for my posts and really appreciate how much I have improved over the years, but now I'm just not producing content that I'm quite proud of— it almost feels like my post quality had been better before when I read over some older posts from maybe about three years ago. I'm the kind of person that likes to challenge myself, and I do get that the solution is to just write more and challenge myself, but even then, I'm just not quite feeling it, and I've been feeling somewhat left behind by the same community that I help and staff, with no fault to anyone at all for that happening.

I'm not sure if this is burn out or anything else, but a friend of mine suggested retirement like Miyazaki instead of hiatus'ing for these unsure feelings— the pressure to return and produce would be off my shoulders, and I wouldn't feel like there's a deadline for me to come back to. And then, like Miyazaki if it really strikes my fancy, to come back to it fully recharged with four projects under my belt because I got too itchy from not writing.

Has anyone ever retired from RP and came back, or considered retiring from roleplay? This is just a really weird spot for me to consider because this has been one of my longstanding hobbies, but it does bother me that I'm not feeling quite as voracious as I used to about writing, and it's hard for me to want to do something with half a heart. How has your roleplay experience been?

Cancer/Ox

I'd say my signs are pretty chaotic. I have a Cancer Sun, Virgo Moon that gets absolutely screwed over by my Gemini Rising