does anyone know where to get a good post apoc zombie rp? i might be in the market soon.

i got so many new replies to respond to in the past day and i'm so hyped to sit down at my computer and respond to them all.... huehuehue... i'm having so much fun, this is what rp is supposed to be

It is quite liberating to just write posts for a few days.

I dunno, the line you gave sounds perfectly fine to me.

I have been posting in the mornings again, and I have been really happy about that habit starting again. I enjoy it a lot.

Love it when two seemingly unrelated events tell you why they're actually connected

I hate that my illness makes me so inconsistent to rp with. I'll be having a blast and then BAM writing has to take a backseat. And then I feel like a flake, which makes me embarrassed, which makes me avoidant, and it just keeps doubling down.

And I hate even more that my social anxiety makes it hard for me to be brave enough to slink back to sites after long absences and request to rejoin. ;A;

I know people will almost certainly be understanding, but I just feel like I'd be annoying. otz

my advice is this.

let people love you.

i've suffered with chronic illness a long time, and i know how it goes. but i also know how much it makes my heart swell when an rp partner talks to me about a scene we had in the past, or something they appreciate about one of my characters, or how my writing inspired them in some way.

even if you aren't writing in the moment, what you've done is still out there, resting in someone's heart and mind.

give yourself some credit for that. that joy is all yours. you don't have to be ashamed to feel it.

you're treasured, and i'm very sorry to hear about your struggle with illness and anxiety. i hope your day is kind to you. u v u

overrated, cheesy advice that should be said more often: love yourself, and take not being lacking, either by skill, misfortune, or circumstances, to be a shame you have to be embarrassed about. everyone has to take care of themselves and until one can provide a healthy support for themselves to be confident enough, don't be too hard on yourself if you're unable to serve others as much as you'd like. some would call it selfishness, but i view an individual as two person. one who is you, and another who is your friend. so don't forget to look at your thoughts as how you would with a friend! you know better this friend of yours better than anyone else. they want to write and see others enjoy their company, but life can be a big bad btch to them at times.

and think of the good things too! yeah, it really sucks when things don't go well and you feel like people are just putting up with you. but for sure, being with you also involves many plenty of positive things! don't let the bad part overshadow the good parts too. 

of course, i won't say i understand what it's like to live with such a debilitating sickness. i am sure it is difficult, but i think you are being too hard on yourself when you have that on top of all these introspective judgments. 

there's also a common saying in our language: be makapal na mukha. it means "shameless" or "having the audacity of" and by definition, it is a negative saying. but it's also common to say it to ourselves in a joking/cheerful manner as a way to make ourselves braver. we understand it's a bit too much, but we also desire the opportunity to be happy regardless of how we deem ourselves (or by others) to be "unworthy." It's saying, "yeah i know it's shameless BUT i'm just going to do it okay? plsss lmao". it's not just in that saying too. another common filipino phrase, bahala na (tl que sera sera) has a negative connotation of fatalism but from the filipino perspective, it's also a traditional value. not even bsing at this point since this was a paper i did in college. these sayings were born forth in attempt to brace ourselves from circumstances outside of control, stemming from erratic weathers in a tropical country relying on argiculture. we say bahala na to be brave enough to step forward despite how uneasy we feel.

so, just imparting some filo reckless optimism. ganun talaga is what we say. "it be like that!" in a comforting manner

How is this post getting to be almost 3000 words and still not done?

Sadly think i hit some burnout on rp. Hope it clears soon my brain is flooding with ideas.

got my desk all set up and internet on and hopefully will be back to writing soon! been spending time rping on 7 days instead because it is easier at the moment than setting forth with the effort to write words.