I had gone over all the hurdles required to get my scuba-diving license, but when finally getting to the final test (where we'd need to dive down into water that was deeper than the swimming pool we'd practiced in), I learned I couldn't equalize the pressure because of inner-ear complications and couldn't pass the test because of it. That was a bummer.


What part of your own personality are you most proud of?

Overall, I really think I'm happy about my dedication. It takes a while time for me to become dedicated to something, but if that thing is what I truly and honestly believe will work or that I love, I go all-out. I genuinely get excited about the topic matter too; being able to find something good in it as well, which I'm most proud of myself for doing. c:

What was the part of a show/movie/game/etc., that had a positive effect on you?

This is going to sound super geeky but Doctor Who holds a special place in my heart! There were many scenes in that show that spoke to my soul, but there is one part where the 9th Doctor says something along the lines of "In 900 years of time and space, I have never met anyone who wasn't important." That quote meant so much to me at the time, and it still makes me emotional thinking about it. Doctor Who is full of quotes that pretty much were what got me through some of my darkest times <3

If you could solve one negative major occurrence in the world (natural disasters, famine, pestilence, war, pollution, slavery, etc) what would it be and why?

there's a lot of murder mysteries and people getting away with murder and missing children, and I was very close to becoming an aspiring homicide detective and/or forensic scientist many years ago and due to certain circumstances (being 18 and indecisive), i decided to change my major, but i still think about going back to school for it because cases keep rising and i want to be able to help.

Q: If you could pick one video game that has made an impact on your life in some way or another, what would it be?

Back when I rp'd Pokemon pretty heavily I helped staff a site called Years To Remember. It was based around an old fan trailer of Pokemon in a darker setting. Battling was basically illegal and took place in underground rings. Team Rocket controlled all of Kanto and you were either a rebel, a rocket, or someone trying to get by.

My character was a fiery youth named Michael (back when I struggled to think up character names so I used my own) who lost his parents because Team Rocket set their house on fire. Rather that be afraid of it - he used it as motivation. Turning the thing that changed his life into his weapon.

The character was rough around the edges but he wasn't an edgelord or anything. He was just focused. He had one goal: Destroy Team Rocket and nothing else but that mattered. He was good at it too. There were Rocket characters actively looking for him, he was inspiring other rebels, it was nice. Even got to plot towards him rescuing Victini from Team Rocket and using it as his ace.

(I got cool a template graphic made for em too that I still have)

Everything changed for him when he met Cherise. She was a street performer and used her Pokemon to entertain civilians. Sometimes she'd cause distractions for the rebels when it was needed. The plot between them hadn't started out as a romance. Michael had been involved with someone else at the time (a Rocket no less) but it ended up there. The two just got along. She made him smile, he made her laugh, and for once he realized there was more to life than revenge.

I remember me and her player had a nice romantic thread in our underground base. He was struggling to tell her how he felt, she sang him a song, he said he loved her, she kissed him, and it was amazing.

In fact - their relationship was so good that when YTR died off me and Cherise's player created our own site. All just so we could to keep playing them. Anarchy Rising. The plot of the site was basically just a timeskip of Years To Remember and in a different region. V1 of Anarchy came and went so we made a V2. This time we flooded Hoenn, had Cherise 'die' when it flooded - Michael pulled a Squall (FF8 character) and changed his name to Kaiden (mostly cause it felt weird using my name. The character wasn't me - I just sucked with names). Her death changed him, he'd seen a lot of people die at this point, but her death impacted him the most.

He hardened, starting drinking to numb the pain - still fought the good fight but it wasn't the same. He still had one of her Pokemon too. A Fletchinder that we had plotted blamed em for her dying. Meanwhile, Cherise hadn't died but was brainwashed and gonna be used against the rebels.

Real fanficy but we were having fun.

Sadly, we never got to get into any of that stuff because Anarchy v2 kinda just feel apart. Largely due to us dealing with real life and not having the time to invest in staffing a Pokemon site. I tried to revamp it once or twice but it was never truly the same.

It sticks with me so much because I've never had a plot like it again. Hell, I've never had another roleplay partner quite like Fel either. She was willing to a create whole websites with me just to so we could keep writing together. We were good friends.

I miss her.

We still check-up on another from time to time but she's so busy with life that she doesn't rp anymore. It sucks.

Question: What's one thing you'd wish done but didn't for one reason or another?

Honestly? I would wish for my college to be paid for. Of course I got my scholarships and all that, it still leaves a heavy and stressful bill on my plate twice a year. Though, In a way I feel like it's super cheap to ask for relief like that. I have a sense of ownership and responsibility every time I pay my school bill. It makes me feel good about myself. I feel like having someone else pay for it would take away that sense of pride.

What is the one thing you look for when searching for a f2u template on resource sites. And is it difficult to find?

I like to have an icon, and a 200x400 image in posting templates preferably that doesn't scroll, and yeah it is. :'D I like to make lots of graphics and I like to use them!! Luckily I had a lovely friend make me one for my birthday two years back, but I do sometimes go and check f2u to see if I could use something else just to shake it up.

Tell me about your comfort character. Who are they? What specifically do you relate too?

Tell me about your comfort character. Who are they? What specifically do you relate too?

I mean, writing-wise? I've got a couple, yeah, though none hit quite as hard as two of my biggest muses as of late. Don't get me wrong; both of them are honestly awful people when you strip them down to their most bare, but I've still poured more of myself than I ever expected to. One of them is, despite being a witch hunter devoted to his thankless cause, an ultimately sweet and loving guy who cares too much, talks too much, and doesn't quite know who he is outside of said thankless cause. Nothing's really called to him, his identity ephemeral to the whims of his family, and he's satisfied with it because as long as that means he has some semblance of identity, that's okay. He's comfortable in his path because it's preordained and he has nothing else outside of it. It's a lot of projecting on my end, because for as long as I could remember I've been at that crossroads where I don't know what I want to do in life or where my passions lie. It always feels as if if I pursue one thing, it means choosing not to do another thing, and there just seems to be too much time and not enough time to just settle, y'know?

The other one, meanwhile, is the complete opposite. She's an ambitious, take-no-shit woman who's always been a little too intense, a little too angry at the world, and never satisfied. The kind of person who grew up with so much prejudice and intergenerational trauma it made her terrified of the possibility she would never be worthy of existing as more than a footnote. A lot of her personality—snark, temper, pride, stubbornness, etc.—absolutely mirror my own because I've been just as much raised in an environment that demands fighting for notice, for a voice, etc. And where I falter, she rises, and I want to have that same kind of confidence in myself while knowing what I want. She absolutely is an obsessive genius loner (a la Beth Harmon from the Queen's Gambit), but also? That kind of self-satisfaction and determination amidst the worst odds around would be,,,,, pretty nice. Yeah.

Oop, I went rambly. Anyway. As for my question—

If there was one thing, any thing, you could ask your future self: what would it be?

If I had to ask my future self anything it would probably be something along the lines of "Is it worth it?" There's a lot of struggles and stresses happening right now, and making the right decisions is always hard. Keeping with something you really want to quit always raises these kinds of questions so. Is it worth it to keep going like this?


What is your favorite thing about joining a new rp site? I mean, what do you look for that makes you really want to stay there?

A: I don't join a lot of sites because I'm a nervous bean, but the site that had the greatest impact on me when joining did so because it essentially had a hype squad. Everyone was incredibly supportive of... like... everything? Character concept? Everyone's like, "YO, that's so cool!" New hobby you're trying out? "That's amazing, get it!" 'Community' is such a vague term, but people on the same site to make most every aspect of the RP exciting is probably what I want the most out of a site. Unfortunately, that same level of energy is pretty hard to find.

Q: If you had to swear off one of the major food groups for the rest of your life, which one would you go without?

dairy. developing lactose tolerance anyway so it's not like i'd be missing out on a lot, ha-ha. (agony.)

what character in any form of animated has your favorite character design, regardless of whether you like them as a character or not?

A: Raven Cronwell from Elsword. I prefer his Reckless Fist / Rage Hearts design, but his other designs are also great. Honestly, I've been using him as an FC for so long. That whenever I picture a certain character of mine he's what I get.

Q: If you won the lottery tomorrow what's the first thing you'd buy with the money?

A: Probably pay off my rent for the next good while before I got my bearings. I'm not really motivated by money- I enjoy being able to not worry about finances, especially in times like this where it's really a blessing to have a job at all. I know I definitely wouldn't quit my job- I bust my ass to get to one where I'm paid well -and- I love the work and I'm not throwing that away. Probably a college fund for baby or something.

If we're talking absolutely ridiculous amounts of Uncle Moneybags- use it fund my hobby/career as quirky but immensely wealthy adventuring treasure hunter. May descend into villainy and construct some dungeons yknow. Rich madman things. Oh, and chinchilla!

Q: Remember that first schoolyard crush? Say they confessed their affections for you today- what happens?