I wish someone told me that people leaving RPs or ghosting you is just a fact of life and it's not necessarily because of something you did.

[...] that no individual plot is the sole thing someone can have or write. people can want to focus on other things, and you're allowed to do it too. it's not the end of the world if something loses steam when the engine's still running.

Expectations are the thief of joy. The reward of roleplay is in the writing of the roleplay itself.

The sooner you drop expectations for specific outcomes in your roleplay, the more you can be pleasantly surprised by where your stories lead you instead.

That RP isn't a numbers game. Too many admins — but especially those who are new to running a community — have fallen for the allure of "bigger is better"/"the more the merrier" for their site(s). I.e. Being too fixated in growing their member base at the expense of just about everything else. Like, not caring if these members integrate well into the community and/or are able to get plots with other members. This often leads to a vicious cycle where even though the site gets a lot of new registrants, it has a poor member retention rate — and to make up for the members that drop from the site, the admins bring in more registrants... and the cycle continues. Yes, the more the merrier, but let's not forget that too many cooks spoil the soup as well. Quality over quantity!

I wish someone had told very, very young me that rp involves writing with other people, not just next to them.

As a shy, socially inept teenager, I had no idea! My idea of rp was creating characters and writing posts of them doing things by themselves. Super boring. Thank goodness I learned how to reach out and communicate and plot with others, it's made things way more fun!

Wish somebody told me to just keep it casual with rp partners. Seems like the closer I get, the more I view people as friends, the more I end up burned. Keeping it casual 2023.

Definitely this, I came into the thread with a similar thought. I wish someone would had told me that shipping plots were not just cringed fanfiction and smut writing but also a way to develop a character, address off-panel/off-screen issues, actions, and dialogue in a way to emotionally grow your character and mature them.

To echo syra and Kuroya -- the point of roleplay is to write what YOU find fun.

Not what other people say is fun. Not what other people believe should be fun for you.

Write what you, yourself, enjoy writing. Even if other people don't get it.

You're not writing for them.

That it's totally okay if you can't write with everybody— though of course, I'll try my best when I'm a staffer, I've learned not to take it as personally if I'm not able to write with everybody on a forum. Sometimes, characters don't click, or we don't all get along OOC, and it's totally fine! We're all just trying our best here and want to write. As long as you aren't purposefully excluding others and are down to write when someone attempts to plot with you, you're in the clear. I can't expect everybody to want to write with me, and that's totally okay too— life is busy, and sometimes we can't have larger thread loads. Most of the time, it isn't a testament to your personal abilities.

Coming from mostly smaller sites, I'd felt this effect more, and having mostly been a staffer for the past couple years had made me feel obligated to make sure I was writing with everybody, but it's honestly better just to follow what sparks joy and to return what energy you're given.

that its fine to have a Type!!!! it has nothing to do with range!!!!! i will write pretty boys + nonbinary coded women until i die and that is OK

Repeat after me: Any post is better than no post! Don't get wrapped up in writing the most perfectest post in the world. Some posts will be long, some will be short. Some will be shit, some will be masterpieces. The important thing is giving your partner something legible that pushes the plot forward, rather than accidentally ghosting a thread just because you didn't think your writing was good enough. Especially since I feel like most sites these days are low or no word counts.