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Staffing Confessions

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Staffing Confessions written Nov 26, 2018 4:58:27 GMT
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Maybe it's just me... but no matter the site, I've always had a harder time making close friends as a staffer than as a member? Sure, I get to know more people (and get more attention overall) when I have The Title™... but I deffs have difficulty dumping attention on the people I want to know better the same way I used to be able to. Maybe it's because of how staff responsibilities eat up my time — or because I don't want to showcase something that could be misconstrued as blatant favoritism — but like... make friends, how do?
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Staffing Confessions written Nov 26, 2018 15:59:06 GMT
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I think that's natural

People tend to have a natural distance from staffers. I don't know why - I behave just the same as a staffer as I do as a member - but I totally getcha.

They'll be other times though where I feel like people listen to me more and include me in more things because I'm a staffer rather than some sites where I've been a member and have just faded into the background.


My confession is that sometimes I have to hold myself back when people are rping their characters *wrong*. (lol). Like when I don't understand their character's motivations and it seems like they're just doing that plot because it's "cool" and not because it makes sense and, as a staffer, I'm like... urgh do I step in here on behalf of other members and be like - you're hurting the integrity of the writing culture, or can I leave this one be... and I have to play the balancing judging act on when it's okay for me to step in as a staffer and when it's just me being a perfectionist control freak lol
last edit on Nov 26, 2018 16:01:09 GMT by JD
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Staffing Confessions written Nov 26, 2018 17:39:52 GMT
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do u know... la-hee?


i'm too used to the feeling of drowning in apps to review. there's been no apps in the notification thread for the last three weeks, and while a break from reviews is nice, i'm having a LOT of paranoia. like, i just feel like i'm forgetting there's something to review (it's happened before), so i keep checking the thread, but there's nothing there. every couple of days i'm just checking the thread like "did i miss something?" /cries softly
last edit on Nov 26, 2018 17:40:09 GMT by valka
if you think i haven't been keeping up with pp, think again
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Staffing Confessions written Nov 27, 2018 10:47:46 GMT
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Nov 26, 2018 17:39:52 GMT said:


i'm too used to the feeling of drowning in apps to review. there's been no apps in the notification thread for the last three weeks, and while a break from reviews is nice, i'm having a LOT of paranoia. like, i just feel like i'm forgetting there's something to review (it's happened before), so i keep checking the thread, but there's nothing there. every couple of days i'm just checking the thread like "did i miss something?" /cries softly

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Lol - I'm like this when I'm up to date on all my admin tasks! I kinda sit there with my cup of tea going... okay - what did I miss?
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Staffing Confessions written Nov 30, 2018 16:12:04 GMT
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do u know... la-hee?


i'm sick and tired of people not posting their fc reserves in code tags even when there's big ol' bold text telling them to do so right above the reserve code
last edit on Nov 30, 2018 16:15:28 GMT by valka
if you think i haven't been keeping up with pp, think again
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Staffing Confessions written Nov 30, 2018 18:40:59 GMT
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when im staff i keep a special eye on people who use super hypersexualized art right off the bat bc 99% of the time in my experience they end up being the biggest trouble makers or end up making people uncomfortable with stuff and its just become a huge red flag for me.
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Staffing Confessions written Nov 30, 2018 20:24:03 GMT
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Nov 30, 2018 18:40:59 GMT said:
when im staff i keep a special eye on people who use super hypersexualized art right off the bat bc 99% of the time in my experience they end up being the biggest trouble makers or end up making people uncomfortable with stuff and its just become a huge red flag for me.


All I use is hypersexualized art honestly. I'm shameless lmao. Girls w/ their titties out are fun.

Also whenever I was staff anywhere in the past, my member pop. had a bad habit of just talking about their characters only in the cbox. Like, yo... it really just turns new members off and makes everyone look like they're circlejerking. Might just be a pet peev of mine.


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Staffing Confessions written Nov 30, 2018 23:21:44 GMT
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this entire thread is the biggest mood of proboards since the v5 switch and half the animanga community abandoned ship to jcink



• the fact that some people think its staffs responsibility to cater and hand hold them through a problem that can easily be solved by communication is both sad and funny. like is it a problem pertaining to the sites information? for the event? no it's because tim doesn't want to plot with you? jeff is using your anime icons of stolen art from pixiv? well fuck billy im sorry. oh, you're mad at me now cause they're on my site? well fuck me i guess i forgot all these random proboards role players are my kids i must have blacked out that horrendous pregnancy. if you have a problem with another member just talk to them about it, don't regress to being an eleven year old kid who needs their hand held pls like im not anyones parent im just some trashy bitch like the rest of you who wants to role-play on a forum hosting site
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Staffing Confessions written Dec 7, 2018 15:31:26 GMT
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my soul ages another year every time i have to deal with the people who seem to just exist so that they can have in-character measuring contests for who's got the best and most powerful character.

i get that for some people it's an attractive thing, and you can do you, but it's just really not my style to start with, my entire soul gets exhausted by that personality type, and it's always a headache for me between making sure the app is balanced (i hate the 1k+ pends i typically end up writing for these characters) and low-key hoping we don't get more repeats of game-breaking stuff just being casually done without the staff being aware of it until long after the fact.
last edit on Dec 7, 2018 15:32:04 GMT by Kuroya


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Staffing Confessions written Dec 13, 2018 13:08:32 GMT
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Oh, oh, I got a staffer blurb! >:3 (I staff Art Role-play games tho!)

When the time comes to kick/ban a big problem member who decided this was his day to rack up "3 strikes" consecutively and I...

Suddenly get anxiety feeling like I don't have the actual authority to kick this person. This quickly combines with the crushing guilt after my hesitation for failing to do my job as a staff member right away and clean up the mess in the chatroom/roleplay setting. :"D

Then the lasting mixture of guilt/anxiety afterwards 'cause I'm not sure I made the right decision sadjksldjasksldja.

This is why I should only be co-staff, not head-staff. uwu
My brain is CERTAIN I did something wrong and everyone hates me until someone higher up than me tells me I did alright.
last edit on Dec 13, 2018 13:09:17 GMT by shizuka
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Staffing Confessions written Dec 15, 2018 21:14:22 GMT
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i know you see yourself as a fighter. well, i see myself as one, too.


something i've been thinking about for a few years, as it always seems to happen to me:

i am tired of being the "bad cop" of admin teams. like, somehow, i always end up falling into the role where i have to be the one to point out problems, or say when something is not okay. i also end up something like a guard dog, being the one to defend against rude people/annoyances. and like... that's fine. but it's not easy on me. if someone needs to step up and do it, i will. but i don't want to be seen as some heartless/nitpicky bitch. i am actually... ridiculously sensitive. and i end up crying over site related shit a lot more often than a person should. this is all online and shouldn't bother me irl, but... fuck, does it.

i've also been thrown under the bus so many times, to appease other members. like, oh i don't really have an issue with it myself, but.... and guess what? i'm the but, because i saw a very serious issue with a certain thing. it really eats away at me. i know there is usually a staff/member sort of divide, but this just makes it grow wider and wider.

i try my hardest to remain fair and impartial, and i work in the background to make sure everything comes off as kindly but as firmly as necessary... but i'm still the bad guy at the end of the day. the one who gives out all the bad news and the one who no one wants to interact with.

maybe i care too much about these things. but... staffing has become painful for me. so much so, that i'm hesitant to help out even when a friend asks me to.

i just want to have a good time and write, just like everyone else. i'm tired of ending up the bad guy.

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Staffing Confessions written Dec 15, 2018 22:01:43 GMT
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Dec 15, 2018 21:14:22 GMT said:


something i've been thinking about for a few years, as it always seems to happen to me:

i am tired of being the "bad cop" of admin teams. like, somehow, i always end up falling into the role where i have to be the one to point out problems, or say when something is not okay. i also end up something like a guard dog, being the one to defend against rude people/annoyances. and like... that's fine. but it's not easy on me. if someone needs to step up and do it, i will. but i don't want to be seen as some heartless/nitpicky bitch. i am actually... ridiculously sensitive. and i end up crying over site related shit a lot more often than a person should. this is all online and shouldn't bother me irl, but... fuck, does it.

i've also been thrown under the bus so many times, to appease other members. like, oh i don't really have an issue with it myself, but.... and guess what? i'm the but, because i saw a very serious issue with a certain thing. it really eats away at me. i know there is usually a staff/member sort of divide, but this just makes it grow wider and wider.

i try my hardest to remain fair and impartial, and i work in the background to make sure everything comes off as kindly but as firmly as necessary... but i'm still the bad guy at the end of the day. the one who gives out all the bad news and the one who no one wants to interact with.

maybe i care too much about these things. but... staffing has become painful for me. so much so, that i'm hesitant to help out even when a friend asks me to.

i just want to have a good time and write, just like everyone else. i'm tired of ending up the bad guy.



Praise Jesus thank you.
I am always the bad cop.
I always have to be the bad guy to put their foot down on things.
It kills me and it always puts me in a position with members that they think the worst of me just because I have to be the one who is stern / lays down the rules at times.
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Staffing Confessions written Dec 16, 2018 2:21:21 GMT
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Dec 15, 2018 21:14:22 GMT said:


something i've been thinking about for a few years, as it always seems to happen to me:

i am tired of being the "bad cop" of admin teams. like, somehow, i always end up falling into the role where i have to be the one to point out problems, or say when something is not okay. i also end up something like a guard dog, being the one to defend against rude people/annoyances. and like... that's fine. but it's not easy on me. if someone needs to step up and do it, i will. but i don't want to be seen as some heartless/nitpicky bitch. i am actually... ridiculously sensitive. and i end up crying over site related shit a lot more often than a person should. this is all online and shouldn't bother me irl, but... fuck, does it.

i've also been thrown under the bus so many times, to appease other members. like, oh i don't really have an issue with it myself, but.... and guess what? i'm the but, because i saw a very serious issue with a certain thing. it really eats away at me. i know there is usually a staff/member sort of divide, but this just makes it grow wider and wider.

i try my hardest to remain fair and impartial, and i work in the background to make sure everything comes off as kindly but as firmly as necessary... but i'm still the bad guy at the end of the day. the one who gives out all the bad news and the one who no one wants to interact with.

maybe i care too much about these things. but... staffing has become painful for me. so much so, that i'm hesitant to help out even when a friend asks me to.

i just want to have a good time and write, just like everyone else. i'm tired of ending up the bad guy.


I'm not fully involved in your situation, and I've never been a staff member so I can't really empathize, but I'm sorry to hear about this. This sounds to me like it's negatively impacting your mood and your life, if I'm correct in assuming so.

I wouldn't say just because something is online doesn't mean it shouldn't bother you. Still, the good thing about hobbies online is that if they start to become toxic, you can walk away from them--and even then, it's not walking away from a hobby per se, it's walking away from managing a hobby for other people. I would really suggest that, if staffing has really become detrimental to your mental and emotional health, you stop doing it for your own sake, even if your friend asks for help.

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